Something different

I am listening to some new music that I downloaded just a few minutes ago, and for some reason I have never written with music on, so we will see how it goes. I think I may get too distracted, but I know lots of people in the world can listen to music while doing other things. For me, I get really absorbed in the music, so I can listen to it while I run, or while I am in the car, but that's about it, since I listen to every word and sound. It's very distracting! It's a weird exercise though, because I can't hear my voice in my head while I am typing this. My new work schedule is awesome, i get every Monday and Tuesday off and always open Saturday and close Sunday, which means I can have a Saturday night out if I want one. And it's cool because I have a couple days off in a row to get stuff done. Yesterday was Brian/Julie day, and that was so fun! Brian dropped his car off to get an oil change and fix a factory recall issue, and meanwhile we had adventures. We went down to San Marcos to go hit up some outlets, and that was sort of epic, because I went to the gap and every single thing I tried on fit and looked cute, yay diet! After buying some summer clothes, and a MUCH needed new bathing suit for Liam we dropped my car off at the shop to get the key unstuck from the ignition. (funny story, I have been driving with my key stuck in my ignition for 2 weeks!) After that we went to the Slaughter Lane Alamo Drafthouse and watched Cabin in the Woods which I thought was hilarious. It was definitely a little gross and jumpy scary from time to time, but it was pretty funny and a neat premise. I don't know if you should run out and see it on the big screen, but rent it for sure. (Movie review and blog in one! That's money!) After all of that awesomeness we came home and watched 3 episodes of Downton Abbey. It was like a whole vacation wrapped into one very full day! Today is more of a, running errands and realizing I have 4 hours till Liam gets home and have accomplished very little, kind of day. I am going to the brewery to pay for the rental for Amy's shower, getting the tables, linens, chairs etc rentals out of the way, calling a lawyer, and CLEANING. My house is like a home for wayward dust bunnies lately and everyones allergies are suffering! Quick diet update: 9.1 pounds and I am on day 15. I am burnt out on asparagus, iced tea, zucchini, and now strawberries too, but there are lots of other fruits and veggies out there, so I am hanging in there! And for a glimpse of the randomness of Brian, Liam and my life, a sweet story: The other day, Brian came home after going to the HEB in East Austin with a present for me! I have named her Stella and she now lives in the yard!

A life of no more home visits

I feel like I already posted this, but can't find it anywhere, so I must have just talked about it, CRAZY notion. The day before we left to go to Odessa for Easter we finally got a call from Sky's FAD worker. After a year of her refusing to return any of our calls because she misunderstood that when we said it didn't seem like he was ever going to come home, we didn't mean we never wanted him to come home, she finally realized we just meant based on where he has been it seemed unlikely. So, she finally called back and of course blamed our FAD worker on the miscommunication, and who knows where the truth really lies. Either way, some good things developed from the phone call. We got an update on him, which was disheartening, although his FAD worker seemed to think it was hilarious. He has basically become a product of the system, using frequent suicide threats to get out of class work, bed time, a tough roommate situation, what have you. He has made friends with the nurses at the psych hospital and loves to go there, in fact time before last that he was there he hugged the nurses and said "see you soon" and indeed threatened suicide 3 days later to return for what he thinks of as a 72 hour vacation. Unfortunately, he doesn't seem to understand the big picture, that he is a teenager now, and the odds of him aging out and being on his own in 5 years with no coping skills are pretty great. And it seems as if no one is really trying to drill that point home. Otherwise, he seems to be getting along with people fairly well, and still hating school. So, in the 2 years since he left, nothing has changed, except that his bi annual trip to the hospital has been upped to at least every 6 weeks. But they aren't worried, they think he has no intention of committing suicide, despite the fact that he has actually attempted it before...I tell ya, I have so little faith in our childcare system. A couple of positive things did come of the phone call and the actions that followed it. We have been granted similar rights to a biological parent. We can't check him out and take him home, but can talk to him whenever we want, visit, send gifts, and call and get updates. Another VERY good thing is that our case has been closed until such a time as it might be likely for him to come home. He can even come for visits if he is deemed ready. So that means no more home visits, fridge inspections, limits on pools, or keeping his room at a constant and depressing state of ready. Not all good news for sure, but nothing new, and way less stress, so it's a mixed bag for sure. Anyway, that's the update, and if anyone wants to send him a card or anything I am happy to send it along for you, just email me for my address, julieconnally@gmail.com.

I put a lot on my "plate" this week!

I put Plate in quotes, because I am on a diet and have not put a lot on any physical plates for a week now. But the metaphorical plate is pretty full! I started my new job yesterday, and while it is certainly a job title often held by high school seniors and freshmen drop outs, I am still pretty happy about it. Also, I feel like Barnes and Noble is pretty wicked awesome about hiring smarties! (Yup, I counted myself as a smartie despite the use of pretty wicked awesome.) I love the Barnes and Noble true life training, wherein they give you a store tour and say GO. And you go or you don't, but you are weeded out pretty quickly. I feel like I went. With no training at Sunset, very little at Arbor, and a quick, "call if you need me." I was set adrift in the wild world of head cashiering. In my first 5 minutes I had 2 returns and a cash pickup, and within the first hour we had a VERY angry but definitely misunderstood gentlemen. However, I learned by minute 30 that this would definitely be a job I could do well. Despite the MUCH higher volume of grumplestilskins who shop there versus my alma mater, Sunset Valley, there is room to be myself and maybe to motivate people a little bit. But, I was hungry and that was no bueno, but brings me to another thing I have on my mysterious food withholding plate! This diet is Rawesome. In fact, I like it so much that the next 33 days should continue to be no problem for me. But, it's a big change, and with it comes weird weird mood swings, headaches and waves of hunger that can only be squashed with a banana or some baby carrots sunbathing in guac. Apparently mushy is my new cheese! New diet, new job, that is a lot to do at the same time. And it wouldn't be so bad if I hadn't also said no no no to alcohol. But, I figured, raw food, not so much as soaking up the booze! So, now my social life is a little hazy (and not the good boozy hazy that leads to the inevitable hangover), because I am wanting to be sure my resolve is strong before venturing into the world. I have to say, all this change is a good thing. I am down 6.7 pounds now, I love (so far) my new position, my new fellow employees seem nice and not scary like I was told. So, lots going on, but it's all good. On a sort of related side note, someone I follow on Twitter and who's blog I read made an innocuous comment the other day about how he had been sick for weeks, but the silver lining was that he had lost 10 pounds. People of the world jumped down his throat because he was being insensitive to the fat community. But my question is, as someone who talks about weight loss a lot, especially while dieting, is, is it insensitive if you are fighting the weight fight yourself? I mean, he and I are both no Olsen twin. Neither are we morbidly obese, but we both have struggled the better part of our life against genetics and for me a total lack of self control when it comes to cheese and pasta. So is a side comment about hey I might feel like shit, but at least I lost a few pounds really that terrible? EDIT: Here is a screenshot of some of the comments from my google plus page.

The results as promised!

So, not to totally brag, but today I have made my own sorbet, smoothies for me and Liam, am in the process of making fruit roll up type things, and sweet potato chips. But, the most impressive thing I have made is the almond milk. It is SO good! And easy! Not cheap though, I honestly think buying the carton might be cheaper, but I have never bought it before and liked it, so I guess the extra 50 cents is worth it. I am pretty excited because I have been really hungry today, since all this crap takes like DAYS of preparation, so I know tomorrow I can actually eat meals all day and not just spend the day getting ready for the future! In fact, I have breakfasts and partial lunches ready for multiple days. BUT, back to the almond milk. First, the day before you think you might be thirsty/bakey/hungry, soak 2 cups of almonds in purified water for 8 hours. Next, drain and rinse them. After that, you mix the almonds with 4 1/2 cups of purified water in a blender for 30 seconds. Strain the pulp from the liquid, store the pulp to make things later, rinse the blender, and put the liquid back in. Then add agave or some other sweetener, 2 tablespoons or so, and a teaspoon or 2 of vanilla. Mix it all up, and wah la. Done and delicious! Good to have for 5 days in your fridge. Here are the photos!

This is all of it getting strained.

And all of it ready for the fridge! Yay!

A money saving tip

This is not revolutionary, probably, but I just went to the grocery store and filled my cart with fresh awesome produce, and it was 11.00$. That is 11.00$ to feed myself for 4 delicious meals, Brian for at least 1 and Liam to have snacks. 11.00$ to make juices with, and some type of weird but probably tasty breakfast fruit sushi roll. OK, I did also spend money on a mesh strainer because I didn't previously own one, to make the juice, but I feel like most people have access to such a device, or to a cheesecloth at least. So, if you are worried about stretching those dollars, might I suggest seasonal, local, fresh, fruits and veggies? Pounds of the stuff will only set you back a few dollars. Also, if you need your car inspected, and live in the Austin area, I suggest the jiffy lube on Brodie lane, it only took a few minutes, and they were kind enough to check for any potential pitfalls before they started, so in case I would have failed I could just come back later and not have to pay. That's TWO money saving tips! AND, they gave me a free H2O car wash voucher with the service. THREE!!! If I think about it, I will come back and put up a picture of my almond milk after I finish it, I hope it is gonna be tasty! I am using the pulp for some bread type thing too, I think. So far, raw vegan diet is going very well! I am loving the flavors and already losing weight!

Yes she is on another crazy diet!

Anyone reading this who knows me personally knows that about once a year I embark on a crazy will power meets total lack of common sense diet for anywhere from 10 days to a month. Well, this year, I am at it again. The goal is always detoxing and weight loss, and this year I am going less extreme, in that it's not the lemonade diet, but more extreme in that it's gonna last 40 days! What? But lent just ended. If you refer back to posts you will see this is a little of , MAN, I ate/drank/acted like a crazy person over Easter weekend, and a little of me putting my money where my mouth is. So, today is day 2, and thus far I am alive and not hating life. Here's to 39 more! And the cray cray diet of the year is (drumroll please.........) raw, vegan. And now the reasoning behind it. (Like a crazy person needs a reason except to say my mother always called me fat.) But here is the other reason. I have been vegetarian for 4 years, and go vegan from time to time because I have en egg allergy anyway, don't drink much milk, so it's only cheese, and that is not unreasonably hard. Raw is partially because I don't want to cook all the time, and partially because my friend is dieting with me and she is allergic to gluten, so raw helps with all that. Now, I am not a total crazy person, yes there will be no alcohol or candy or cookies for 40 days, but I am maintaining the right to eat 20% non raw gluten free things every day, and decided that I can live without beer, but not without coffee and tea, so caffeine stays too! I know you are all rightly thinking, just eat less and exercise, and you would all be right. But, I like my annual spring diets, and do always manage to keep off at least 10 of the pounds I lose from them each year. Plus, it's gotta be good for the local economy, I am buying a LOT of produce! If anyone is interested in what one might eat on a raw vegan diet, hit me up, and I also will be putting tasty dinners up on pinterest. I should have taken a picture of dinner last night to put up, but instead I will do a before and after of myself and we can all see if there is a difference!!!

A moment of clarity, maybe don't read this one either.

I have been working a lot on my book lately, and I guess it's not making the transition from memoir to fiction imitating life because I don't want it to. But, I had this breakthrough while writing, which was really cool. A moment of clarity when I was like, Whoa, that's what happened! I am sure of this, because I was told, but my sister and I were little chains that forced my mom to stay in a loveless marriage with a person she despised. She told me with her actions when I was child, and with very clear words when I was in my late teens or early twenties. While you would think it would be TOTALLY obvious, it clearly wasn't...but I think that's the reason for all the nutty things I do. I really want people to love me. I think that is why Sky came into our life, why the school did, and why I am constantly surrounding myself with friends and real family who has supported me and loved me my whole adult life. So, for you guys, the ones who have supported me in this unwavering manner, thank you, and sorry if I didn't fully recognize how crazy important you are to me! And to Liam, I love you, and I will never regret you. Of course, you were not the product of a loveless marriage, but a too in love relationship! Anyway, recognizing anything about oneself is weird, and this is super weird. I am so glad I am a friendly, outgoing person, but wonder if that's who I would have become under different circumstances. Also, I think my GIANT ego, is because I pretty much had to inflate it myself for so long, and apparently, I am damn good at that!!!! I should use my abilities for good and inflate everyone else's too. Ready? You are sooooo pretty! You have an amazing voice. You kick ass at life, your job, and your home! You are a superstar! Feel better? You should, because all those things are true! Now, I am off to rinse the dye from my hair, because I started going gray at 19, and now I am starting to think I know why!!! ;)

Seriously, this will offend you, don't read it.

I have a few pet peeves to air today. As a non religious person myself, I really don't care what religious people do for their holidays or whatnot. However, it bugs me to no end the new trend other non's have of giving stuff up for lent. Guys, lenten sacrifices are supposed to be akin to the 40 days spent in the desert, also they are supposed to be done for the glory of god, and also as some weird guilt thing to make yourself feel better that your savior died on the cross for you. (I know I am non religious, but I was raised a weird blend of devout Catholic and heretic cult.) SO, for you non's to give stuff up for lent, is ridiculous. The most common reason I have found for it is "I want to test myself for 40 days and it's an easy one because the calender marks it for you." Do you all not have a calendar? Anyone who needs me to mark 40 days for you, let me know, and I will buy you a calendar and mark out 40 days for you to "test yourself." I get a discount, I work in a bookstore. Now, I am NOT speaking here to actual practicing Catholics or Christians, more power to you, give up or add on things as you will. (Also, I have tons of respect for Christians who add things, like working at a soup kitchen, or who organize clothing drives or even Easter egg hunts for under privileged churches, rather than using lent as a 40 day excuse to diet in Jesus' name. Jesus probably does not care. So, for me, I am going on a 40 day vegan cleanse starting on Tuesday, because I have a damn calendar and feel like testing myself. Now, some of my friends will take offense to this, and you probably should know my now how I feel about this whole situation, so relax. It's not like I haven't rolled my eyes at you every year before this. BUT, I am not without a solution. All my awesome friends, next year, let's all pick a month that is not March and work out whatever addiction issues we feel we might have together, not while the religious right gets smug satisfaction that a holiday that started with a celebration to the goddess of fertility has ended in a neo hipster group of wanna be Christians sacrificing shit just in case they are alcoholics or addicted to bread. Then, the last day we can all get together and have a giant party and hunt for pocket shots and dairy products and steak. Or whatever you decide to give up. I am not unreasonable. I think lent is fine for people who spend at least 10 other days a year thinking specifically about the Christian god, but for the rest of us, let's branch out and pick another 40 days! Since I didn't present this idea in time this year, to my weirdly non religious lenten sacrificers, good luck, and I'll bet you are all looking forward to midnight this Saturday night, and way to go if you accomplished whatever you set out to do. Actually, I guess that goes out to be religious friends as well! As for me, I am enjoying Easter as if it is my Mardi Gras, because Tuesday the healthy food and working out begin again! Oh, so it was just the one pet peeve, not several! I had something else I had really wanted to talk about, but forgot it when something reminded me of this other annoyance. And remember, before you all get mad at me, I am pretty open about my being weirdly judgmental when I don't like something, and you have all known this for 1-33 years, depending on how long you have known me. It doesn't mean I don't love you, or that I am actually wasting emotion being mad at you. HAHAHA, I am 33 at Easter. Maybe I should have given something up this year, you know, just in case! My initials are JC after all. ;)

More things I love about Austin

My dad spent a whopping 30 hours in Austin this weekend, and we made him do touristy things. He did not want to. He wanted to stay in the AC because 84 degrees was too hot to be outside! Reason 10,000,456,754,356 I will never move to Boston, BTW. But we made him, and he at least pretended to be impressed by the basement in the capitol. Didn't seem to care much about the rotunda or the actual upper floors, but the basement seemed amazing. Who knows. Anyway, I love Austin, especially in the spring, even though it kills me. The reason I love it in the spring is that we are not privy to a great many obvious seasons here. But when the weather gods permit, every few years, we get spring. The bright green, damp, colorful spring that makes you feel more alive, (although also closer to death, stupid pollen). This year, we have been extra lucky to get a spring that has lasted more than the regular 5-7 days, and we are all determined to experience it! Since my 100th post promise I am trying to be better about putting pictures up, so here are some of the family forcing tourism and experiencing the gorgeous Austin springtime. So here are the kids and my dad walking up Congress:

And here is Liam pretending to shoot Kayla with a cannon while she gracefully dives out of the way. Can you sense the fear?

And here is Liam with my dad, and the last picture is all the kids in front of the Driskill Hotel.

Don't you love the bright clothing and all that sunshine? I know I do!!! Also, note the awesome pictures taken courtesy of my new phone! Thanks, Dad!!!!