A life of ...

A life of what? Some people said today it was new beginnings. To me it felt very much like an ending. Or like a comma. Not quite the end, but definitely a pause. A life of friends, a life of family. A life of love. I live a life of love, that I am not quite sure I deserve. Today I had the worst day I can remember having, but the crazy thing is, it turned into a great day. Sure it was sad, I experienced some loss, as did Leslee, Jen, Ann, Matt, and Stacey, not to mention 27 children and their parents, but I understood something cosmic today. I was breaking, my heart, my soul, my ego, just about to collapse and my friends and my family unquestioningly rallied by my side. Stood next to me, called me, texted me, labored with me, and just loved me. I don't have the words. I am the luckiest person in the world. I want to work my whole life to make sure that everyone in my life is supported, loved, cherished. You know what is funny though, I went back on facebook after a little hiatus, and unfriended like 100 people because who cares? My life is not measured through having a ton of "friends". It's not like I don't like them, or have any emotion one way or another, but we are gifted certain relationships in our life, and those are the ones I want to spend energy on. My husband, my sister, my best friends, people I love and who love me; they should take up my time. I feel like this is coming out wrong. It's not about this. It's not about facebook. It's about life. Making a difference, helping people, loving people. I don't deserve this. Some really tough things happened today. Some people were not very nice at all, and at first it seemed tragic, like I wanted to cry and puke all the same time. Then, a miracle happened, and all this love just poured out all over me, all day, and all that bad stuff was totally meaningless. Name calling, mean spiritedness, some sleaziness, it didn't effect me at all. I was in this bubble of support, and nothing bad touched me. I don't think I will repay anyone for what they did for me today, but I will work even harder to spread love and hope. I know this sounds ridiculous, I totally get that everyone who is not me today will be like, "what the hell is Julie smoking?". But my life changed today, for real. And I hope forever. Thank you, thank you, thank you, parents of the school, my family, my friends, almost total strangers, thank you for your humanity. A million billion times, thank you!